The Number Two Reason To Love Your Job

Ever feel like you weren’t being paid what you were really worth at work? Have a SHITTY boss, and want to feel a little relief?

In this edition of Best of the Worst: Android Apps, we explore the translated from German Poopster, that takes your input (salary) and times your output (shitting on the clock) to tell you how profitable you have just been as you destroyed your company restroom and a few coworkers’ lunches, as well.
ENJOY.Illustrated by a pic of bbq hotlinks, that may have been fine out in the restaurant’s dining room, but just looked a bit out of place in the wall inside the men’s room.

https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.poop.poopster

Poopster!
GiDabbelju – January 24, 2013

Description
They often do big business at work? Would not you like to know how much you earn it? How much their feces is actually worth? With this app, now you can!
Simply enter in the settings of the gross hourly wage, go to the toilet, do Start, business, stop and enjoy the profits!
PS: The measurement process can be started and runs automatically in the background when the app is exited via the home key. Thus, while the business will continue to be played as usual on the internet surfing or gaming.
Warning: This app is still under construction and will gradually STILL better.
Friends already “Best app in the world”!
Plans include the following functions:
– Charts (monthly / weekly / daily) for the merit in comparison
– More statistics!
– Widget (If it has to go fast)
– Calculation of water savings (because the business is not done at home)

Currently works Share on Facebook not really. This function has the highest priority and will soon follow!
Reviews Write a Review
 
Ulrich Spille January 24, 2013
Amazing Finally i have an App where i can calculate my shit. You know u by urself, its so much effort to absorpe all the vitamins. SO download this shit to rate ur shit and see shit is money! SHIT

Additional information
 
Requires Android
2.2 and up
 
Content Rating
Low Maturity
 

What’s in a Meme? and On Downvoting.

downvoting

This cracks me up LOL(not lol). I get what they’re saying, but disagree completely.
Part of what makes any meme have a lasting impression or create real guffaws is that it has an element of unexpectedness, often from the caption being rather incongruous to the photo it’s added onto.

Those that would criticize ‘Original Content’ should remember that ALL content is created by someone, and was once original and pristine. Just because a grandma and a teenaged girl and a 48 year old virgin posing as a teenaged girl haven’t visited a meme generator site and added their own dribble to the bukkake drivel that the visual/textual art form has become does not mean it should be banished from anyone ever getting a chance to see it.
And yet, there are downvoters lurking and salivating for a chance to do just that. “Well, I didn’t like that, so I must protect the rest of my fellow peers from it’s horrific 4 second long influence on their fragile minds and DESTROY IT AND IT’S CREATOR, SO IT CAN NEVER CREATE AGAIN. Then I shall go and fap to whatever the hell celebrity is being paraded around in her boobjob enhanced cleavage in PG rated shots because I spend all my time showboating my downvoting skills on image posting sites and don’t even know there’s real life porn out there.”

Downvoting is censorship. Downvoting is bookburning. I wish there were a way to somehow give my opinion about downvoters in a way that is measurable and could be aggregated with thousands of other people’s opinions and put into a neat graphical form for others to see and judge. Some sort of aggregated points scoring mechanism, or a vote…..hhmmm.

Here is a speech by Salman Rushdie, slightly adapted for the occasion. Enjoy. Or don’t. But no voting.

Genius of stupidity

Cartoon Puzzle: Fun for all the Wrong Reasons

The app looks about as unexciting as watching animation get created, but the description is ridiculously entertaining. The imitation-wiki-like article they provide educates us about the purpose and history of animation itself, rightfully calling it a high art.
What is the Best part? You will finally have an answer to your longstanding debate: Is Batman or Mickey Mouse more fitting of this app description declaring him as the “Jesus of cartoon characters”? Holy Holy, Batman, I think it’s a trap!

https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.droidkitchen.cartoon_puzzle

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New New Definitions for Old New Old Words

Sometimes old words are adopted by new technology, and used in a new way, requiring a new definition. But new technology moves quickly, and sometimes after we’ve used the technology a while the initial definition needs an update to something more accurate. That’s when it’s time for NEW NEW DEFINITIONS FOR OLD NEW WORDS.  

Today’s word:   SYNC

Old Definition: short form of either the noun synchronization (to be in sync ) or the verb synchronize (to put in sync); harmonize (-ation)

Old New Definition: verb or noun form still apply, but referring to the technological process of making multiple devices/platforms such as home computer,  cell phone, laptop, ipod, iPad all have the same data at the same time.

New New Definition: for no useful or excusable reason, this application will make at least four copies of all your shit.

SYNC

No mistakes, just happy accidents

On Art Appreciation and Dick Pics

“I want you to know that I totally respect you as a person. So when you say things like you are ‘NOT AT ALL, PLEASE DON’T’ interested in having me send you photographs of my dick, I take that to heart and I want to really prove it to you. So I hope you don’t make me feel unappreciated about this, because, sincerely, I put a great deal of effort and time into this highly detailed pencil drawing…”

Best of The Worst Awards – Mobile Apps & App Descriptions

BestAppTranslationEver

This is the first in the series:  Best Of The Worst Awards. This perplexing yet entertaining entry comes in under the category Mobile Apps And App Descriptions.
Please enjoy. Remember, I do not endorse any developer or recommend any of these apps actually be downloaded into your mobile unit. Doing so may have unknown adverse effects, and possibly even brick your device.  Only you are responsible for your actions. I’ve always wanted to say this right before having sex.

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